Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Don't be Ahasamed of Your Past Because It Doesn't Define Your Future

This has been one of the hardest lessons I've had to learn. That statement means two very important things to me. The first thing is not letting what had happend to you define you. I would walk around and feel like a freak because all that's happened to me. I was I'm the hospital for trying to commit suicide. I was abused most of my childhood. I had and still have depression, aniexty, post traumatic stress syndrome, and panic disorder. Okay that's a part of me but that isn't who I am. You aren't a victim of th past or your issues. You are a child of God. You are THE child of the King of Kings. He is smiling down on you right now because you're fighting whatever darkness you have in your life. My family is wracked out. I used to think we could have a reality TV show; however, with everything that has happened it wouldn't even be HBO appropriate. All of that doesn't define me. I'm not Mr.Kwiatkowski's daughter. No. I'm kick ass Kaitlin the servant and child of God.

Yes people have talked about me and not wanted to be around me.
"Her life brings too much drama and I don't want to be a part if that."
"She is faking her depression for attention."
"That one psycho chick."
Cool. Think what you want but I know of all that darkness doesn't define me. I am strong and choose to rise above it and so can you.

The second thing: your past mistakes doesn't define you. Oh golly I'm no where near perfect. I find myself gossiping, judging, and many other things. I regret being the crazy ex girlfriend. I regret beig the attention seeker 8th grader who did whatever to fit in. I regret laughing at you and calling you names. I regret and am sorry for my sins of yesterday, today, and tomorrow. I'm born a sinner. No matter how hard I try I will make mistakes and fall short of Gods glory. Luckily, we are all blessed becuase God is a loving and forgiving God on top of just being mega chill and all around awesome! Every time I sin or I turn my back on God I recognize my wrongs, apologize, then God accepts me back with open arms.

Craziest thought ever. Before God even created the world, He thought of you personally. He knew all the mistakes you were and are going to make even before you had the chance to make Him yet He still loved and loves you. He loves you so much that He sent His only son to die for you and take your sins with Him. When Jesus was on that cross He knew all the wrongs you were going to do but He wanted to die for you. With Christ you're a new creation. He forgives and you aren't a prisoner to the past. Everyday is a new day with a clean slate. You can't go back into the past and change it so you learn and grow from it.

The past can seem like this darkness hanging over you for everyone to see. You've given it too much power for too long. It's the past. God is your future.

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