Tuesday, March 19, 2013

The Ultimate Love Story

I just wanted to be loved. That's it. My own father couldn't provide the love I needed. I live in house with just my ma and I. Half of my family is missing. The two men in my life, my father and brother, do not have much contact with me. We are two completely separate families. I never felt loved. I felt like I was worthless because my own father chose alcohol over me. I searching desperately for a guy to love me. Then I was blessed with a guy in shining armor. He brought the biggest smile to my face and warmed my heart. It had to be too good to be true and it was. Because I was trying to have him fill my void of feeling unloved I got clingy and he became my everything. Not even could the guy I was in love with fill my empty heart. My mom, my ex, my dad, my brother, even my friends couldn't take away the feeling of worthlessness and being unloved. I thought I was going to be feel like "whole" in my heart forever.

That all changed when I really got to know Jesus. I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior on June 29th 2011 but I had a lot of growing to do. I now realize what I didn't back then, which was how much Jesus loves me. I can't even comprehend it. I learned a lot of the past few months. Although I didn't really have an earthly father, I had a heavenly father who loved perfectly and would never let me down.  Nothing can compare to His love and the way you feel in His presence, trust me I have tried everything else. 

Think about this, in Pslam 139 it talks about God knowing everything you do. He knows when you sit down and stand up. He knows all your thoughts and every square inch of your heart. He even knows what you are going to say before you say it. First reading this I was sacred. I am NOT perfect at all and I make mistakes all the time. I think mean things and I can be disrespectful at times. But then I kept reading. He still loves us! No matter what you do, good or bad, His love for you will never change. It's a constant, overwhelming love. God's loving thoughts about YOU outnumbered the grains of sand on this earth! Just let that sink in. That's so powerful. 

We can never and have never been able to earn His love. It is generously given to us. Because God sent His son Jesus down on Earth to die for us and take our sins we can now be in a relationship with him. There are harsh people in this world who are lost and cause us pain we can stand against it. So, next time you feel unloved or as if no one cares think about this: Jesus died for you! God's thoughts about you out number the sands. Also, He took all this time to specially make you. Each of your hairs are numbered. I think of all of this like this. Imagine the most popular guy at school. He is a legend and everyone knows him. Now think of yourself as this invisible girl at school who no one even seem to see you're there. It's prom and that popular guys asks YOU! There's nothing special about us but God loves you so much. 

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